WHY???

I'll be honest in the last three years I have asked that question a lot. Most of the time my inquiries are addressed to God.

Why is there disease in the world, especially Lyme disease?
Why is Noelle so sick?
Why doesn't she get better?
Why when we were obedient concerning adoption have things been so difficult for our family?
Why when there are little things we have prayed for Noelle has the answer been no so often?
WHY, WHY, WHY?

Obviously these are my personal selfish whys. If I go beyond the walls of my home, even just as far as our extended families, the list grows and grows.

Our church, Prairie Lakes, for the second fall is doing a church wide study. We are taking the challenge to read the New Testament between now and Thanksgiving. Most of those that have committed to the challenge are meeting with a small group to process the readings and our personal journals.

The first week that we met our group struggled with these questions, especially in relation to an exhibit on Human Trafficking that we were discussing. Two things hit me hard.

**When we ask why, we are doubting God' goodness!
**Focusing on why is a tool of the devil!

I think both of these comments were raised by a woman quoting her son after he lost his four year old child! Wow! I have so far to go.

Lord, help me to believe in your goodness. No matter what my circumstances. Help me to believe in your goodness and your love for Noelle. Amen. So be it!!