No, we are NOT adopting again. But based on our experiences there are huge differences between adopting a younger child and an older child. For me the bonding process has been much more difficult. With Sabrina it was very natural. Even though she was 17 months old, she felt even younger. We were the ones that taught her to walk and talk. Almost from day one she has felt no different than our biological children. Even though I am not a huge physical touch person I think it was so valuable to carry her, snuggle her, tuck her in bed, etc.
Having missed the gradual bonding process with Teme, I am still at a loss. Having been the main caretaker for Noelle and being pulled in so many directions our survival mode has been, Scott takes care of Teme and I take care of Noelle. We have managed to maintain shared parenting of Sabrina.
So here I am. Trying to live with and parent a child that sometimes feels like a stranger. HELP! I know that some adoptive parents read my blog. If you have suggestions please let me know. The counselor I am seeing does specialize in adoption issues so I am hoping this will help in time as well.